What's the best joke you've heard recently?
A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: “My friend is dead! What can I do?”
The operator, in a calm soothing voice says: “Just take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead.” There is a silence, then a shot is heard.
The guy's voice comes back on the line. He says: “OK, now what?“
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Best Jokes
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13 - GateKeeper
14 - Millennium Force 15 - Enchanted Tales with Belle
There was something a while back on Letterman's Fun Facts where he said:
"Due to a 6 Months Writers Strike, The Weather Channel Aired Reruns." Today is Jessica Simpsons birthday, She Turned 28: "And she's happy she says in 5 years she will be 28.5 Years Old." 943 Coasters around the World! Countdown to 1000!
http://sfgamworld.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=15&t=15272 Runner Up of the 2017 SFGAmWorld Elimination Thread
Not really jokes but still.
The wise man that said nothings imposible probly hasn't tried slamming a revolving door. "Due to current budget cuts, the light at the end of the tunnel will be turned off untill further notice". =-D Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. Bob has been missing since Friday. God bless NIU
Next SFGAm trip: Today May 1st SFGAm '10 ride count-53
What do Michael Jackson and a 360 have in common?
They are both made of white plastic and 8 year old boys turn them on.  Let's see... 12 days til colonoscopy (appt got moved :D )
No school today :D
^you mean Xbox 360
some people might not get it..... kind of inappropriate but mods can delete Guy walks up to a lady in a bar "hello pretty lady can I buy you a drink?" -"No thanks, alcohol is bad for my legs" "Sorry to hear that... Do they swell?" -"No they open"
The first 3 are all Blonde Jokes. Blondes who easily get offended should dismiss this post. (I actually have worser ones that I probably can't post. Email me if you want some.)
Q: Whats the Difference between A Blonde and a Blow-Up Doll? A: Blow-up dolls have less Plastic Parts Q: Why Don't Blondes clean Elevators? A: They keep forgetting the route Q: Whats the Difference between a Blonde and A Brunette? A: Brunettes are Hot Q: How can you have a High Dollar Value in The United States? A: Move to Europe Q: What do you call A Park That Disney makes with its own money, Buys the land, and gets no government funding, Benefits, or Incentives? A: When it happens, I'll tell ya Q: What do you call a mean Canadian Person? A: To be honest, I don't think there is a mean Canadian Person Q: Whats the Difference between The Food Network and The Sci-Fi Channel? A: The Food Network has a Women (Rachel Ray) Q: Whats the Difference between a Blonde and a Black Guy? A: A Black Guy can be President Q: Whats the Difference between Kiddieland Chicago and Walt Disney World? A: Kiddieland is Fun Q: What do you call a person who thinks Magnum is the Best Steel Coaster in the World? A: Someone who has only been on Magnum and A Vekoma Boomerang Q: Whats the Difference between - Gas being only 34 Cents in America in the Next 4 Weeks - Amusement Today having a true, Believable Ride, Park & Coaster Ratings A: Gas being only 34 Cents in 4 weeks could actually happen Q: Whats the Difference between "Village of Gurnee Locals" and "The SFOG kid that got his head chopped off"? A: The SFOG kid that got his head chopped off is smart The Differences between Men and Women Jokes - Women eat Salad, Men Eat Slim Jims - Women spend months picking a good Christmas Gift, Men buy Gift Cards - Women shop for food based on Price, Men shop by Color - Women make men hold their purse, Men… Hold their Purse - Women like to knit, Men can amuse ourselves for hours with a sheet of bubble wrap - Women invest their money in Stock Portfolios, Men invest our money in Souvenir Autographs - Women have retirement funds, Men play the lottery or go to Vegas 943 Coasters around the World! Countdown to 1000!
http://sfgamworld.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=15&t=15272 Runner Up of the 2017 SFGAmWorld Elimination Thread
Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree?
Because it was dead. Why'd the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first mnkey. Why'd the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer-pressure. 13 - GateKeeper
14 - Millennium Force 15 - Enchanted Tales with Belle
coasterboy, those are the worst "jokes" i have ever read ever in 23 years of being alive.
To quote the mighty Crow of MST3K fame "Not quite a joke but an incredible simulation" [quote="jackluver18"]^Doesn't have a Signature[/quote]
[quote="Coaster Boy"]My sister locked me in a Car Trunk.[/quote] [quote="David"]What's really funny, is that you think I'm from the GP (General Public). When indeed, I most likely know far more about the coaster, as I've rode it multiple times. [/quote]
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